Top 5 Secrets to Saving Your Marriage
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Marriage is a beautiful thing that tightly binds two people in love, legally, financially, emotionally and spiritually. However, marriage can also be difficult and the source of much pain and anxiety. Troubled marriages can often be saved when the parties commit themselves to improve their marriage in a meaningful way. These are some ideas:
Spend Quality Time Together
In today’s busy life, it is easy to get caught up with work, social, childrearing and humanitarian efforts. Often, spouses are the first ones to be neglected. However, a strong marriage requires continued nurturing. Many experts recommend weekly date nights as a way to reconnect with your spouse during a busy week. Steal time away by participating in a hobby together, going out to a restaurant, taking a walk or having a picnic indoors. Even if finances put a constraint on this, there are creative ways to spend more time together that do not cost money.
It is also easy for a marriage to evolve into a business relationship as you discuss finances, decisions regarding the children, retirement accounts and other mundane topics. Keep the spirit alive in your relationship by having fun and laughing together. Having fun and laughing can create enthusiasm in your relationship.
Use the Power of Touch
Do not underestimate the power of touch. Kissing, hugging and holding hands are meaningful forms of intimacy. It is important not to lose this connection along the way. Simply talking while holding each other’s hand can be an important part of rejuvenating a relationship. Once spouses start reconnecting, other forms of intimacy will always follow.
Be the One to Change
Sometimes couples get married hoping that their partner will change. However, someone cannot make another person change. This has to come from within. Rather than focusing on the changes you want to see in your partner, focus on what you have the ability to control: yourself. If your partner has questioned some type of routine response, or unhealthy habit, try to change it. This change may even inspire your spouse to work on his or her own issues. If you beg, plead, ask or request your spouse to change, he or she may feel defensive and may not do what you ask. If you lead by example, you may create positive momentum in your marriage.
Don’t Compare Yourself to Others
In a marriage it is important to understand that each one is unique. Do not try to hold your marriage to a standard that you see in another relationship. What works for them might not work for you and vice versa. Instead, focus on your own marriage and what you can do improve it. If another couple inspires you or you want to adapt certain positive behaviors, that is fine. But trying to fit your marriage into the mold of another is likely to backfire.
The family law attorneys at Amaya & Associates want to help you. Contact one of our lawyers to discuss your options.